Begin Again
by Lynt
Summary: What would happen if Jack and Daniel had been in a relationship, then Daniel was downsized. Slash to begin with but no explicit scenes.


"All right, enough with the dirty looks already." Jack flung the report he'd been reading down onto the dining room table and glared at Daniel. "What did I do this time?"

Daniel stopped pacing and turned to face Jack, giving him an innocent stare. "Do? You didn't **do **anything, Jack."

"Oh." Jack picked up the report again. "That's okay then–"

"It was what you **said** that's the problem," Daniel cut in.

_Oy. _Jack gritted his teeth and forced a smile. "Okay, what did I **say**?"

Daniel crossed his arms over his chest and gave Jack his best exasperated glare. "You know what you said. It's what you always say. Like that time on-"

Jack held up a hand to halt the flow of what was likely to be a long and detailed account of his shortcomings. "Remind me in as few words as possible. The memory's not as good as it used to be."

Daniel used his fingers to frame quotation marks in the air. "If the only thing we're going to find is a few ruins, we may as well go home."

"You admitted yourself there was nothing of value–" Jack began.

"That I could **see**," Daniel interrupted. "I needed more time to go into the temple, see what was there."

"That temple was unstable. No way was I letting anyone, especially you, go in there."

"Exactly!"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jack asked, totally confused.

"Especially me. You still act like I'm some wet behind the ears novice who–"

"You're a trouble magnet is what you are." Jack smiled to take the sting from his words. He walked around the table, reaching out to grasp Daniel's shoulders. "I've lost count of the number of times we've almost lost you lately. I'm not going to risk something happening to you again, for the sake of a **possible** few artifacts. If we can get the temple stabilized, you have permission to go back."

Daniel sighed and his shoulders slumped. He leaned forward, allowing Jack to embrace him, wrapping his arms around Jack's waist. "You don't play fair, O'Neill, using the old guilt trip to win an argument."

Jack kissed the top of Daniel's head. "Hey, I just know orders aren't going to work with you."

"I'm a civilian," Daniel said, his voice muffled by Jack's chest. "You can't **order **me to do anything."

"Get your ass up those stairs, Jackson, and get naked. Wait for me."

Daniel straightened and sketched a stiff salute. "Yes, sir!" And surprisingly, did as he was told.

o0o

They shared breakfast together the following morning then headed back to the mountain in separate cars. While there was no reason for themto hide their relationship, at least officially – Daniel wasn't military, for one thing - there were too many other concerns to consider for either of them to be comfortable in coming out. They'd taken Carter and Teal'c into their confidence. Being on the same team and just about living in each other's pockets meant it would be too hard to keep it a secret for long.

Jack had initially been worried about Carter's reaction. He couldn't deny that he'd certainly been very interested in a relationship with her and it seemed, that interest was reciprocated. But life… death had a funny way of turning things on their ass, and though it had taken Daniel's ascension for Jack to finally admit to his feelings for Daniel to himself, he'd wasted no time in sharing that information with Daniel once he was back with them. To his delight and overwhelming relief, Daniel had smiled shyly at him and told Jack he'd had a jones for him for quite a while.

Things had been tense between himself and Carter for a while, though on the job, Carter was as focused as she always was. Then she'd met Pete and her attitude toward Jack had softened. She seemed now to accept Jack and Daniel's relationship as a good thing, and for that, Jack was glad.

Jack's cell phone rang and as he answered it, he caught himself in the rear view mirror, a sappy smile on his face. "You've got it bad, O'Neill," he muttered. He flipped open the phone. "Yes, Daniel, what did you forget?"

"_I just remembered I forgot – How did you know I'd forgotten something?"_ Daniel asked.

"Because you forget something every time you stay at my place."

Oh. Right. I forgot –" 

"See you at the base," Jack cut in, knowing full well Daniel's explanation of just what he'd forgotten and just how important it was would not be brief. "Don't be late. We've got a briefing with Hammond at 0800."

"I'll be right behind you," Daniel assured him.

Only he hadn't been. Jack had waited a respectable 30 minutes before giving up and calling Daniel's cell, only to be met with silence. His home phone yielded the same result. Seriously concerned, knowing Daniel would never fob off a briefing without good reason, an unpleasant memory of Daniel standing on the edge of the balcony, addicted to the Light came to mind, fueling Jack's concern.

He stopped off in the briefing room, his car keys already in his hand, his heart pounding with trepidation at what he might find at the apartment. Teal'c and Carter offered to accompany him but Jack shook his head. "See if you can get a GPS reading, Carter–"

Carter shook her head. "There's no signal, sir."

"Which means?"

Carter shrugged. "It's been disabled or jammed somehow."

"Keep trying anyway."

"Yes, sir."

"Teal'c, you keep trying his apartment," Jack continued.

Teal'c inclined his head in agreement.

Hammond stood up. "I'll get Walter to contact the local hospitals and police… just in case."

"Thank you, sir."

But Daniel wasn't at his apartment. His car was there, but there were no signs of a struggle, no clues to his whereabouts. Daniel Jackson had disappeared into thin air.

o0o

"Three days! It's been three days, General, with no sign of him. I'm not giving up now!" Jack thumped Hammond's desk to emphasize his point.

Hammond didn't look fazed by Jack's show of temper. "I'm not asking you to give up, Jack, but it has been three days with no sign of Doctor Jackson, no ransom demands, nothing. I need SG-1 back on active duty, and the president is demanding it. I've got good men working on Doctor Jackson's disappearance. They'll notify us as soon as they have something."

"Not good enough… sir. I know Daniel. He's a member of my team. If anyone should be out looking for him, it should be me!" Jack's cell phone rang, interrupting his rant and he snatched it out of his pocket. "O'Neill! This better be important!"

"_Jack? Now, is that the way to greet an old friend?"_

"Maybourne." Jack rolled his eyes and Sam did likewise. "What do you want, Harry? I'm a little busy right now and last I heard, you got your break."

"_I don't want anything, Jack, but I hear you do. I know where Doctor Jackson is."_

Jack's breath caught in his throat. "How would you know where he is? You've been out of circulation for months."

Maybourne chuckled. _"Old contacts never die, Jack."_ He paused a moment and when he spoke again, he sounded solemn, serious, unlike the Maybourne of old. _"We all know I did some questionable things. I'm not proud of all of it–"_

"Cut to the chase, Harry," Jack interrupted. "Where's Daniel?"

"_Motel just outside of town – The Sunset Lodge. Room 12."_

"Is he okay?"

"_Just get there, Jack, all right? This is one project I never wanted to be associated with. Oh, don't bother taking a platoon with you. My Intel tells me he's alone and they're long gone."_

The phone went dead. Jack stared at it for a moment before closing it and turning to the others. "We've got a lead on Daniel. Let's move."

He took backup. As many as he could muster. He'd stopped trusting Harry Maybourne the first time he'd met him.

o0o

The motel desk clerk verified what Maybourne had said. Two men had booked into the room the night before and left early that morning. Jack still wasn't taking chances. He took the key from the clerk and unlocked the door himself, weapon at the ready. He thought for a brief moment that the room was indeed empty but then he caught a glimpse of a terrified, white face peeking out from beneath the bed. He stepped forward, waving Teal'c and Carter back. The bedspread dropped and the face disappeared. Jack could hear soft, panicked breathing.

He knelt down, groaning as his knees protested the strain and sneaked a look under the bed. Two huge blue eyes, filled with tears, gazed back at him. "Hey there," Jack said quietly. "It's okay. No need to be afraid. We won't hurt you." He held out a hand, and after a long moment, a small hand gripped his. Carefully, he pulled the child clear, lifted him and set him on top of the bedcovers. He smiled at the boy. "My name's Jack and these are my friends, Sam and Teal'c. What's your name?"

The boy stared at him, his mouth working convulsively. Then a sob broke loose and he reached for Jack, who took him in his arms without thought. "Shh," Jack whispered, stroking the boy's sweat-damp blond hair back from his face. "It's okay."

"Are you… Are you my daddy?" the child hiccupped. "The man said they'd bring my daddy."

"We'll find your daddy," Jack promised. "Can you tell me your name?"

"Daniel," the boy said. "Daniel Jackson."

Stunned speechless, Jack turned to face Carter and Teal'c, hoisting the boy onto his hip. He could feel the dampness of tears soaking into his shirt as the child burrowed closer into his embrace. Carter looked as stunned as he felt. Teal'c raised an eyebrow and gave a small shrug. Not much got the big guy flustered.

Jack gave them both a weak smile. "Coincidence, maybe?"

"Heck of a coincidence, if you ask me, sir." Carter stepped closer and reached out to touch the boy's hand. He turned his head and gazed at her with a wide-eyed expression. "Hey there," Carter said. "Is that your real name? Daniel?"

The boy nodded. "The man said it was."

"Don't you remember?" Carter asked.

The boy shoved a thumb into his mouth and sucked on it furiously. "I went to sleep," he said around the digit, "and when I woke up, I couldn't 'member." He sat up a little and looked at Jack. "You're my daddy," he said surely, a smile breaking out on his face. "The man showed me your picture and said you were coming to get me."

"Oy!" Jack immediately thrust the child into Carter's unwilling arms. "No way!" He looked at Teal'c, who gazed steadily back at him. "Come on, T, you know that's not true!"

"I am not always with you in your recreational hours, O'Neill," and Jack was damn sure there was a small grin on Teal'c's face, "however, I concur I do not see any familial similarities between you and the boy."

"See!" Jack looked triumphantly at Carter then back at Teal'c. "Thanks, buddy… I think."

Carter sat the boy on the bed but he immediately raised his hands again to Jack.

"Oh, for crying out…" Jack picked him up and the child wrapped both arms tightly around his neck. "Okay, umm… Dan – Daniel? Who was the man who left you here? Do you know his name?"

Daniel shook his head. "He was old," he said.

"Maybourne?" Carter queried. "He did know where the boy was."

"Wouldn't put it past him," Jack growled. "Okay, let's get this place swept clean. See if they left anything behind, though if Harry's up to his neck in this, I doubt it."

"What will we do with the child?" Teal'c asked. He reached out and chucked Daniel under the chin, earning a small smile.

"Social Services?" Jack suggested, looking at Carter.

"Shouldn't we try to find out who he is first, sir?" Carter said. "I mean, if the NID or the Trust is involved in this… and you have to admit, he does bear a strong resemblance to our Daniel. I don't suppose Daniel's been seeing someone-"

"Definitely not!" Jack barked. "And before you ask how I can be sure of that, I just am, okay?"

Carter held both hands up in a gesture of defense. "We can't take him to the mountain," she said. "Why don't I call Janet, have her meet us at her place?"

Jack nodded. "Good idea. Better notify Hammond while you're at it." He headed for the door with Daniel in his arms. "And I'm gonna give Maybourne a call."

o0o

The child… Daniel… sat on a dining room chair in Fraiser's kitchen, drinking milk and munching on a cookie. His frightening experience hadn't seemed to dampen his appetite, though his gaze stayed firmly fixed on Jack, and had been since they'd arrived several hours before.

Frasier had taken the requisite blood tests, which the child had stoically endured, though his chin had quivered and tears brimmed in his eyes, a faint, accusatory expression that seemed to be reserved especially for Jack on his little face.

Jack wandered out to Frasier's backyard for some privacy and dialed Maybourne's contact number after connecting a portable jammer to his cell phone.

_Daniel_.

He couldn't get his head around the idea that Daniel had cheated on him and produced this child, only to abandon him like so much garbage. Knowing Daniel had spent most of his young life in foster care, Jack knew he wouldn't have left his own son to suffer the same fate. But if that wasn't the case, then where was Daniel, and more importantly, what the hell did- "Harry. What the hell are you up to this time?"

"_Jack! Hope you're jamming the frequency," _Maybourne said in a breezy voice. Jack could hear the muted strains of music in the background.

"Just answer the damn question, Harry."

"_I take it you found Doctor Jackson then."_

"I found someone who says he's Daniel Jackson," Jack replied, his jaw clenching so hard, he was sure he was going to break a tooth.

"_That's him." _Maybourne sounded as though he'd just given Jack the best birthday surprise ever.

"What do you mean, that's him? We found a kid, Harry. No more than six years old."

"_Seems the Trust were experimenting with the nanite technology that had you grow old before your time,"_ Harry continued.

Jack shuddered at just the mention of the little buggers.

"_They got some fool notion in their head that they could reverse Daniel's mental age, thereby returning his memory to the time when he was ascended. Damned if it didn't work too, except for one minor flaw-"_

"Minor? You call this minor?" Jack closed his eyes and did a quick count to ten. Didn't work. If he could, he'd reach through the phone and wrap his hands around Maybourne's scrawny neck.

"_Hey, it wasn't me!" _Maybourne protested. "_When they realized they'd screwed up, they were going to kill the kid and get the hell out of Dodge. I managed to procure the services of a couple of men, trained in Covert Ops. They got the kid to me and I got him to you. Don't I at least deserve some thanks for that? Some small recompense for risking my cover?"_

"Murder good enough for you, Harry?" Jack hissed. "Because I swear when I get my hands on you-"

"_You wanted him alive, I take it," _Maybourne growled back. "_He's alive! Just… smaller. No, don't thank me. My pleasure."_

The counting to ten still wasn't working and Jack was certain his jaws were now locked together. "Why does he think I'm his father? Hmm?"

There was a moment's silence before Harry spoke again. "_Look, the little tyke was scared out of his wits! He couldn't remember who he was, and he had no idea who we were. I already knew you were coming. Didn't want the little guy hightailing it out of there on his own. I figured if I told him his father was coming for him, he'd stay put."_

"And you showed him a picture of me," Jack replied.

"_I figured he'd need to see a familiar face. Honestly, Jack, I only had the boy's best interests at heart."_

Jack sighed. "Yeah, you're all heart, Harry. One more thing, this is reversible, right?" There was a resounding click on the other end of the phone. Snarling, Jack dialed again, only to have the phone ring out. Pissed off and more worried than he wanted to admit, he strode back inside the house.

Janet was crouched by Daniel's side, holding Cassie's dog, Buster. She stood when Jack walked in, placed Buster on the floor, where he sat, watching Daniel avidly, and summoned Jack over to where Teal'c and Carter stood in the kitchen doorway.

"Anything from Maybourne?" she asked.

"Anything from the tests?" Jack replied.

"DNA is a 100 positive match to Doctor Jackson. As far as we can tell, sir, he is Daniel."

"Could he be a clone?" Carter asked.

Janet opened her mouth to speak but Jack beat her to the punch. "According to Maybourne, no. Seems the Trust has been playing around with those Nintendo things…" At Carter and Frasier's puzzled looks, he elaborated, " Remember when I was turned into Old Man Time?"

Carter and Frasier nodded. "The nanites," they said in tandem.

"Yep, those little buggers. Seems they thought they could access Daniel's memories of while he was ascended by making him mentally younger, only they didn't count on there being a physical side effect to the whole damn process."

"Oh my god!" Frasier and Carter were beginning to sound like the Bobbsie Twins and it was giving Jack a headache.

"We're not anywhere close to using the technology like that," Carter said. "Not that we've even thought of it, except for that one time, sir, when you-."

"This is the NID, Carter," Jack interrupted irritably. He so didn't need to be reminded of the days on Kynthia's planet, slowly wasting away. He rubbed at his forehead, trying to dispel the headache that was blooming. He sneaked a glance at Daniel, who sat happily at the table, feeding Cassie's dog a cookie.

"And they stop at nothing to acquire what they want," Teal'c said quietly. "Even this."

"What now?" Jack asked, turning to Janet.

"We need to take him back to the mountain, sir," Frasier said. "I need to run a battery of tests. See if there's any organic damage."

"You can reverse it, right?" Jack asked. "Like you did with me?"

Janet looked more uncertain than he'd ever seen her. "I… I don't know, sir. I'm not going to give you false hope. We have no idea how they might have altered the nanites in order to do this." She smiled tentatively and reached out to touch his hand. "I'll do my best, sir."

"Me, too," Carter added.

"As will I," Teal'c intoned. "If you wish, I will hunt down Maybourne and-"

Jack held up a hand. "Let's not go there, big guy. Don't want to be visiting you in the big house."

Teal'c raised an eyebrow. "What is this 'big house' you speak of, O'Neill?"

"I'll explain it later," Carter assured him with a small smile.

"Until then, I want Daniel back at Cheyenne Mountain under strict observation," Janet said.

Jack nodded slowly. It was all suddenly starting to sink in. Like the worst possible nightmare he'd ever had. As bad as Daniel dying, as bad as Daniel ascending, as bad as thinking he'd never see Daniel again… Maybe worse, because this wasn't his Daniel and if they couldn't fix it, he never would be.

"Daddy?"

Jack turned to face the boy… Daniel, feeling tears stinging his eyes, using every bit of mental fortitude he had to force them back, because this wasn't the time. This wasn't the time for emotion. He needed to be clear-headed, needed to get Daniel… his Daniel back.

"Hey there, Danny," he said, walking over and squatting down in front of the little boy. He looked into his face, seeing clearly now the familiar blue eyes, the dimpled smile. Reaching up, he tousled the curly blond hair. "Tell you what," he said, giving Danny a conspiratorial wink, "seeing you're such a big boy, how about you call me Jack?"

Daniel looked confused. "But you're my daddy, aren't you?"

Jack shook his head, feeling a lump rise in his throat that threatened to choke him. "No, Danny, I'm not. But I'm your friend, and so is Carter and Teal'c and Janet, and we're going to take good care of you."

He tousled Daniel's hair again then stood up and stepped back, motioning Janet forward. "We'll follow you in," he said.

Fraiser looked somewhat confused. "He might feel more comfortable if you-"

"I want to fill Hammond in on the way. He'll be fine."

"Yes, sir." Fraiser turned to Daniel and lifted him into her arms. "Come on, Daniel, we're going for a ride in my car."

Daniel immediately reached out for Jack, kicking his feet against Fraiser's legs. "I want my daddy!" he screamed.

Fraiser glanced at Sam then at Jack. "Sir, I think-"

Jack was already walking out the door. "I'll see you there, Doc." He closed his ears to Daniel's plaintive cries, pulling his car keys from his pocket and pressing the lock release.

"Sir?" Carter ran up just as he was climbing into his SUV. "Daniel's really upset. Wouldn't it be best if you take him?"

"Short answer, Carter? No."

Carter shook her head. "I don't understand. He's a frightened little boy, and it seems you're the one person he trusts."

Jack scrubbed a hand through his hair, closing his eyes briefly as Frasier carried a sobbing Daniel to her car. "Look, Carter, this has been one hell of a day. I just can't deal with looking at him right now, knowing who he is, who he's not anymore." He sighed. "I'm not making any more sense to me than I am to you."

"I know this has got to be hard after Charlie-"

"This has nothing to do with Charlie!" Jack barked. He reached out a hand and touched Carter's arm when she took a step back. "I'm sorry. It's not about Charlie," he reiterated. "It's about Daniel, Daniel and me."

He watched Fraiser buckle Daniel into a car seat she'd borrowed from her neighbor then came to a decision. Opening his door, he climbed out, trotting over to her. He tapped her on the shoulder and when she moved back out of his way, he leaned in through the open door and placed a hand on the crying boy's knee. "Daniel? Hey, buddy, listen to me for just a minute, okay?"

Daniel wiped his nose with the sleeve of his sweater and stared at Jack with huge, tear-filled eyes. "I want to come with you," he sobbed. "Dad… Jack."

"I don't have a special seat in my car for you," Jack explained hastily, "and I promise I'll be right behind you all the way."

Daniel studied him, not looking convinced. Finally, he said, "Promise?"

"Cross my heart," Jack assured him.

"You'll find my daddy?"

Jack swallowed past the lump in his throat. "I'll do my best." Now wasn't the time to try to explain to a six year old with no memory that his father was already dead, had been for years. Just trying to figure out all the ramifications of this was giving him a headache, not to mention what it was doing to his gut.

Daniel nodded then. "Okay."

"Okay."

Jack went back to his car, ignoring the rather hostile looks he was getting from both Carter and Teal'c. He could literally feel Fraiser's glare boring into his back. Tough! They had no idea what this was doing to him, how this was tearing him up inside, and he'd be damned if he was going to cave in now. Meltdown wasn't going to help the kid, and it certainly wasn't going to bring Daniel back.

He climbed into his car and followed Fraiser's out of the driveway. All the way to the mountain, he cursed himself for being the uncaring, unfeeling bastard he was.

o0o

Two exhausting hours later, Daniel slept deeply in an infirmary bed, his tiny hand clutched tightly around Jack's. Jack had stayed with the boy through all the tests, comforting him as best he could when the terrified child reached for him, asking Jack to take him home. "I'll be good, Daddy," he promised tearfully.

"You are good," Jack assured him, wiping sweaty hair back from Daniel's forehead and wiping Daniel's runny nose with a tissue. "You've been a very good boy."

Finally, Daniel had fallen asleep while having a CT scan. Jack sat back, feeling every bit as drained as Daniel looked. Daniel grabbed hold of Jack's hand when they transferred him to a gurney and hadn't let go since.

Jack started awake as the curtains swished and Fraiser walked into the cubicle, followed by Teal'c and Hammond. "What's the verdict?" he asked.

"Good news," Janet replied. "No organ damage at least. He looks as much a six year old boy on the inside as he does on the outside."

"Well, it's nice to have one bit of good news," Jack said. Carefully, he extricated his hand from Daniel's grip, shushing the boy back to sleep when he stirred. Ruefully, he shook his hand, getting the blood flowing once more. "Heck of a grip the kid's got."

"The boy's been terrified out of his mind," Hammond said gently. "I'm not surprised."

"What becomes of Daniel Jackson now?" Teal'c asked.

"Well, he can't stay here," Fraiser said.

"Indeed," Teal'c agreed. "It is at times confining for me. It is certainly no place for a child."

Three heads turned to look at Jack, who held up both hands. "Oh no! No way!"

"He's certainly taken a shine to you, sir," Fraiser said.

"In case you hadn't noticed I have a job, and a pretty demanding job at that. You could take him," Jack suggested to Fraiser. "You've already got Cassie."

"And I have a demanding job too," Frasier said. "It's hard enough finding time to spend with her."

"I have to agree with Colonel O'Neill," Hammond said. "I can't take SG-1 off-duty any longer. I've already asked Doctor Farmer to step in for Doctor Jackson, for the time being. Social Services?" he asked Janet.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea, given Doc - Daniel's special circumstances, sir," she replied.

"Not to mention the Trust might still come after him," Jack added.

Janet held up a hand. "I do have an idea, sir. Doctor Kelly, on my staff, he and his wife are foster parents. I could speak to him, and that way, we can keep an eye on Daniel–"

"Twenty four hour watch," Jack cut in, "until we're certain they're not coming after him."

"Agreed," Hammond said. "How's Colonel Carter doing with her research, Doctor?"

"Nothing yet, sir," Janet replied, "but it's early days. She's hoping she'll come up with a safe way of reverting Daniel to his normal state."

"All right then." Hammond nodded. "I'll leave you to make arrangements with Doctor Kelly. Jack, the boy trusts you. It's probably best if you explain to him what's going on when he wakes up."

"Yes, sir." Jack slumped back down onto the chair and stared at the sleeping child in the bed. "Bet you're gonna love this, Danny boy." Tired, he leaned forward and rested his arms on the top of the bedrail, studying the sleeping child, drinking in the familiar, yet not familiar features. "Cute little bugger, weren't you?" he whispered. Reaching out a finger, he stroked Daniel's flushed cheek, then pulled back as though burned. Leaning back, he held his head in his hands. He couldn't do this. Couldn't afford to get close. "God, Daniel, I miss you," he whispered.

o0o

"_Daniel?" _

_Daniel looked back as he stepped into the elevator to see Jack, running toward him, his arms open wide. "Dad?"_

_Jack swept him up into his arms, swinging him around and kissing his cheek. "You're coming home with me, Daniel," Jack said. "You're coming home with your dad."_

Daniel woke with tears on his cheeks and Doctor Janet looking down at him. "Hey, Daniel," she said, lifting him into her arms. "Did you have a bad dream?"

He shook his head and pushed away from her until she set him back down on the bed. "A good dream," he said. "Where's Jack?"

o0o

Jack locked himself in his office when he knew Daniel was leaving the base. Once again, he knew he looked like an unfeeling asshole and he swore he could hear Daniel crying for him through several feet of concrete wall. He buried his head in his latest mission report, firmly telling himself that this was the best option. That he was doing this for Daniel's benefit, but he failed miserably.

He waited a half hour past the time when he knew Daniel was leaving to meet with his new foster parents before going home. He headed straight for the elevator, hoping like hell he wouldn't run into anyone tonight who thought he needed to talk, to process, because it was the last thing he wanted to do.

o0o

"Hello, Danny." Ann Kelly held out her hand and after a moment's hesitation, Daniel shook it.

"Daniel," he said softly.

Ann crouched down in front of him, still holding his hand. "Sorry, sweetie, what was that?"

Daniel hugged Janet's leg tightly and she reached down and patted his head. "My name is Daniel," he said again.

"It's a very nice name too," Ann replied, smiling. "Daniel, it is." She stood again and ushered them into the house. "Would you like some coffee, Doctor? Maybe Daniel would like some milk and cookies."

"I don't want anything… thank you," Daniel said. He felt like he had a big hole in his stomach that was eating him up inside and he felt so sad, he thought he might cry again. He'd hoped that Jack might come and say goodbye before he left, and he'd waited, thinking up excuses why they couldn't leave yet until Doctor Janet had said they couldn't wait anymore.

She'd led him to the elevator and he'd looked over his shoulder all the way, sure that Jack would come running up any minute and say he was his daddy and he was taking him home, just like he had in his dream earlier, but it hadn't happened. He'd been so sure that Jack was his daddy, that Jack had just forgotten who he was, just like he'd been forgotten everyone else. Now, he wondered if he even had a daddy and mommy of his own. Maybe he was all alone and there really was no one who loved him.

"Okay," Ann said. "How about I take you up to your room so you can get settled?"

Daniel nodded, suddenly struck dumb. Where would they take him if he said no? With his heart pounding, he climbed the stairs with Ann.

"Here we are. This will be your room." Ann gently pushed Daniel ahead of her and Daniel walked into the room.

There were two single beds, covered with brightly striped bedspreads, a dresser against one wall and a study desk against another. Flowered curtains at the window billowed from the breeze blowing in from the open window. A boy, bigger than Daniel, sat on one of the beds, reading a comic book.

"Jake?" Ann said.

The boy looked up and sighed, laying the comic beside him.

"This is Daniel," Ann said, leading Daniel over to Jake's bed. "He'll be staying with us for a while."

Jake studied Daniel carefully then picked up his comic book again. "Hey," he said from behind the pages.

"Hi," Daniel said softly.

Ann led Daniel over to the other bed and set his little suitcase on top of it. "I'll leave you two to get to know each other. Okay, Jake?"

Jake looked up and rolled his eyes. "Sure, whatever."

Ann crouched down in front of Daniel. "I just need to go talk to Doctor Fraiser for a few minutes, honey. Okay? If you need anything, I'm just downstairs."

Daniel nodded, feeling tears sting his eyes. "You won't let Doctor Janet go without saying goodbye, will you?"

"Of course I won't," Ann promised. She stood, tousled his hair and walked to the door. "Jake, show Daniel where the bathroom is, okay?"

Jake nodded and buried his face back in his comic book.

Daniel sat quietly and watched Jake read his comic. He thought about exploring the room but wasn't sure if he should. Finally, Jake tossed his book aside and stretched out on his bed, his arms behind his head.

"So, why are you here?" he asked.

Daniel thought for a moment. He wasn't really sure what Jake was asking. "My… my dad didn't want me to live with him," he said at last. His chest felt really tight and he had a lump in his throat that made it hard to breathe.

"You too," Jake replied.

Daniel stared at him with wide eyes. "Your dad didn't want you either?"

Jake shook his head. "My mom. She got a new boyfriend. He doesn't like kids, so my brother, Andy and me had to go somewhere else."

"You have a brother? Does he live here too?"

"Nah." Jake flopped over onto his side. "He went to another family. They only wanted little kids."

That made Daniel feel incredibly sad, and he felt tears begin to slide down his cheeks. He swiped at his face with his sleeve.

"You got brothers or sisters?" Jake asked.

Daniel shook his head. "I don't think so."

Jake sat up. "What do you mean, you don't think so? You have to know if you've got brothers or sisters!"

Daniel shrugged and picked at a loose thread on the bedspread. "No, I don't have any brothers or sisters, but my dad is coming to get me soon. He's just real busy, but as soon as he stops being busy, he's coming to get me."

Jake snorted and picked up his comic book again. "Yeah, right. My mom told me that two years ago." He lost himself in his comic once more and Daniel sat for a long time watching him before lying down on his bed and closing his eyes. He let the tears come then, keeping his sobs soundless, though it hurt his throat to do so. After a while, he felt himself drifting toward sleep, and even when he heard Doctor Janet whisper his name and press a kiss to his cheek, he couldn't seem to open his eyes and say goodbye.

o0o

It was dark when Daniel woke. Unfamiliar shadows loomed from the corners of the room. He felt sure by now that Jack would have come for him. He didn't know why Jack didn't want to be his daddy anymore and sadness and desolation choked him again. He tried to stifle a sob but it leaked out from his tightly closed throat.

"Do you want me to get Ann?" Jake whispered.

"No," Daniel replied, though in his heart, he really did. "I need to find the bathroom."

"Oh, I forgot earlier. Ann didn't want to wake you before because you were asleep. It's down the hall, first on the right."

"Thank you," Daniel whispered.

"Do you want me to take you?" Jake asked.

"No, I'm big, I'll be okay." Daniel fumbled his way to the door and opened it, stepping into the hallway. There was a light on halfway down the stairs, shedding enough glow to ease his way. He made it to the bathroom and peed, washed his hands then made his way back toward the bedroom. The stairs beckoned, and he stood for a moment, torn between the comfort of a home, if not his own, then at least, somewhere safe, somewhere he was wanted, and the pull toward the man he couldn't really remember but who he felt he should be with.

As quietly as he could, he crept down the stairs. The front door was locked, with a chain high above his reach. Changing direction, Daniel headed out toward the kitchen. He froze when he knocked a chair that scraped against the tiled floor but after a moment when no one descended the stairs, he pulled the chair over to the back door and climbed up, pulling the chain back. Dragging the chair to one side, he opened the door and stepped out into the chilly night.

o0o

Dreams ambushed his slumber, waking him from his sleep, sweat drenching him, a shout of denial lodged in his throat. Visions of Daniel dying, Daniel ascending, lost to him before he had the chance to tell him he cared, to tell him he loved him, were overlaid by images of Danny sobbing in his arms, hiding beneath the motel room bed, reaching out for him as though he was the one person left in the world who mattered.

Jack sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He looked at the alarm clock on the bedside table. 1AM! Crap! He'd been in bed less than an hour. He pulled on his clothes and headed out to the living room. Grabbing the bottle of scotch from the cabinet, he poured himself a shot and swallowed it, almost gagging at the taste. He hadn't been drunk in a long time. Not since Charlie had died. Back then he'd lost himself in the booze, using it as a crutch to shore up the sorrow and guilt. Then Daniel had come back into his life and he'd discovered that life did go on, that finding happiness again didn't mean you were being unfaithful to those you had lost.

Now Daniel was lost to him again, and suddenly getting drunk didn't seem like such a bad idea… except he couldn't get Danny out of his head. Couldn't erase that sad little face, those embracing arms. Couldn't deny his promise to Daniel to love him forever whatever came their way.

He slumped into an armchair and swirled the liquor in the glass, staring into the smoky liquid, remembering Daniel throwing himself in front of a staff blast to save him, Daniel staying with him when he'd had the knowledge of the Ancients' zapped into his brain.

Remembered holding Daniel as he'd sobbed after being addicted to the sarcophagus. _"I know what this is. I know what it's like."_

Remembered watching him die on Apophis' ship. _"I'm not leaving you behind." _

Remembered hugging him when he'd walked up to them, safe and whole again. _"Spacemonkey!"_

**Shit!**

Jack flung the glass at the wall, getting no satisfaction at all from the shattering of the glass, watching the amber liquid dribble down the wall. He stood and strode to the phone. It rang before he had the chance to dial. "O'Neill," he snapped into the receiver.

"_Colonel O'Neill, it's Doctor Fraiser. I just had a phone call from Doctor Kelly. Daniel's gone missing."_

Fear clenched at his heart but he swung into command-mode without registering it. "When?"

"_They're not sure, sir. A couple of hours at least."_

"Our people are searching and sweeping the place?"

"_Of course, sir. General Hammond issued an all-out search, sir."_

"Keep me informed, Doc. I'm on my way."

o0o

"How the hell did they get him out of here with a full unit watching the place?" Jack scrubbed a hand through his hair, frustrated beyond belief. He turned to Ann Kelly. "Nobody heard anything, ma'am?"

Ann shook her head. Her eyes were red-rimmed and she wiped at her tear-stained cheeks with a tissue. Her husband stood beside her, one arm wrapped protectively around her trembling shoulders. "I checked on him before I went to bed," she said. "He hadn't eaten since he got here and I thought he might be hungry, but he was asleep and he looked so exhausted, I didn't want to wake him." She glanced up at her husband. "I should have."

Steve Kelly shook his head. "You weren't to know, honey."

"It's not your fault, ma'am," Jack said gently. "What about the other boy? You said Danny was sharing a room with him?"

"Jake, yes. He's fine, thank god."

"He didn't hear anything, see anything?"

"He said he was asleep."

"The back door was unlocked from the inside, sir," Carter put in, "but there's no sign of forced entry."

"Is that not a particular skill of the Trust?" Teal'c said from where he prowled in front of the living room windows. "After all, they were able to spirit Daniel Jackson away and leave no trace behind."

"Nobody took him," said a voice behind them.

They all turned to look at the young boy standing in the doorway.

"Jake?" Ann motioned to the boy to join them. "What do you mean, honey? You said you were asleep."

"I was!" Jake's cheeks flushed and he looked down at the floor. "He woke up and said he was going to the bathroom. Then I heard him go down the stairs. I heard the chain being taken off the back door."

"You don't know Danny did it," Ann said. "After all, it's too high."

"I watched him leave," Jake said, "from my bedroom. He went into the park across the road."

"Why didn't you tell your parents this before, son?" Jack asked sternly.

"Foster parents," Jake corrected, giving Ann an apologetic look. "He wanted to leave. I know how he felt. I had to come here because Andy's foster parents didn't want big kids." His eyes glistened with tears and he swiped roughly at them. "I ran away once too but they found me and brought me back. I like it here," he said to Ann, "I do. I just miss Andy."

Ann placed a hand under Jake's chin and tilted his head up. "I told you we're working on that, Jake. We'll get Andy here to live with us, I promise you that. In the meantime, Danny's been out there in the cold and dark all this time." She gasped and looked at Jack. "The lake! There's a boating lake in the park."

"Carter, Teal'c, you're with me." Jack turned and headed for the door at a run.

They spread out once they arrived. Jack kept the other soldiers back, figuring Daniel would be more likely to respond to a familiar voice or face than that of a stranger. He played the beam of his flashlight along the ground in front of him as he skirted the edge of a small playground… and froze. "Daniel?"

He waited, willing himself to hear beyond the wind in the trees, the muted sound of traffic from the street nearby. Then he heard it again. A soft sob, followed by sniffling.

"Daniel? It's me, Jack."

There was a moment's silence, then, "Go 'way. I don't like you."

Jack shone his flashlight ahead. The voice came from a large concrete pipe set next to a jungle gym. He made his way over to it and crouched down. Daniel was illuminated in the beam from the light, sitting scrunched up, his arms wrapped around his pulled up knees. His face was smeared with dried tears and mucus and he shivered violently. He looked up, shielding his eyes from the glare of the flashlight. "Go 'way, I said! I don't like you!"

Jack lowered himself to the icy ground with a groan, leaning his back against the edge of the pipe. "Good for you," he said. "I don't like me much either."

"Grownups are bad," Daniel lamented, his voice echoing slightly against the concrete. "Jake can't live with his brother and you don't want me. I want my real dad!"

Jack sighed. "I wish I could do that for you, Daniel, but I can't."

"Is he dead?"

Jack closed his eyes, feeling tears stinging them. "Yes, he is. I'm sorry, buddy." He sat forward and peered into the pipe again. Daniel was crying quietly, his sobs muffled by his hands. "Why don't you come out, huh? It's freezing, you're freezing."

"Can I come home with you?"

And suddenly all Jack wanted to do was gather the frightened little boy up and take him home, show him that his entire world was not lost, prove to him that he still had people who loved him and cared for him. "Yes, you can."

Daniel looked up at that, his eyes narrowed in what looked like suspicion. He reached out one trembling hand toward Jack. "Pinky swear?"

Jack smiled and linked fingers with him, shaking on the deal. "Now can we get out of here? My butt is numb."

Daniel giggled a little at that and then he was scampering forward and launching himself into Jack's arms, clinging tightly to his neck. Jack hugged him back, reaching up to tousle the cold, damp curls, pressing a kiss to Daniel's icy cheek. He shrugged out of his jacket awkwardly and wrapped it around Daniel's shivering body.

"I'm frozen from the inside out," Daniel said with a sigh as he snuggled into the welcome warmth.

"We'll both be icicles if we don't get out of here," Jack said. He climbed to his feet with another groan, cursing his worn out knees under his breath. "Let's go home, huh?" He walked to the edge of the playground then remembered. Pulling his cell phone from his pocket, he dialed Carter. "I've got him," he said when she answered. "He's safe. Meet you both back at the house."

Daniel jerked back and stared at him. "You promised! We made a pinky swear!"

"Hey!" Jack jiggled him a little on his hip. "We have to let everyone know you're okay, pick up your things and say goodbye to Ann and Steve."

"And Jake," Daniel added.

o0o

Jack set Daniel down on the ground while he fished for his door key in his pocket. He unlocked and swung open the door, standing aside to usher Daniel in first. Daniel became uncharacteristically shy, wrapping an arm around Jack's leg, holding him back. "Come on, buddy," Jack urged. "Doc said I could bring you straight home as long as you got warmed up right away."

Daniel looked up at him, his eyes wide, and nodded but didn't move. Jack took the hint, picking the boy up and carrying him into the house. "You'd better start getting around under your steam soon, Daniel," Jack groused, "or your legs will wither away from under-use." He turned on the living room light and suddenly Daniel was squirming to get down again. Jack lowered him to the floor in relief. "How about some hot chocolate?" he suggested.

Daniel nodded enthusiastically. "Do you have marshmallows?" he asked.

Jack rolled his eyes. "Wouldn't be hot chocolate without 'em, would it?" he asked rhetorically.

Daniel shook his head, a cheery smile on his face. "Nope."

Jack headed up the steps to the kitchen. He turned and shook an admonishing finger at Daniel. "Don't go anywhere."

"I won't. Pinky swear, remember?"

o0o

The living room was eerily silent when Jack returned, carrying two steaming mugs of hot chocolate. For a moment, his heart skipped a beat and then he spotted Daniel, curled up in a corner of the couch, his head down, studying something he held in his hands. "Whatcha got there?" Jack asked as he set the mugs on the coffee table and sat down beside the boy.

Daniel held out his hands, revealing a photo set in a silver frame.

"Oh, that." Jack took the proffered picture and smiled. "That was taken when Sam got her promotion. You know these guys, right?"

Daniel nodded. He tapped a finger against the glass. "That's Sam and you and Teal'c." His finger lingered over the fourth person. "Who's that?"

"That…" Jack pulled Daniel closer, allowing him to snuggle up against him. "That is my very best friend."

Daniel looked up at him with solemn eyes. "I thought I was your bestest friend."

"You are," Jack assured him, "but there are all kinds of friends, you know."

Daniel nodded. "He's your bestest grownup friend, right?"

"Right."

"What's his name?"

Jack smiled down at the child who was the embodiment of all Daniel was and would be. "His name is Daniel, just like you."

Daniel grinned at that. "Where is he?"

Jack hoisted Daniel onto his lap and he settled in, leaning back against Jack's chest, grasping hold of one of Jack's hands. "He had to go away," Jack whispered, "just for a while."

"When will he be back?" Daniel asked around a yawn.

"I don't know yet, maybe not for a long time."

"You miss him, huh, like I miss my dad."

"Yeah."

"But you've got me," Daniel added, "and I've got you."

Jack pressed a kiss to the back of Daniel's head. "That's right, buddy. We've got each other."

**END… for now**


End file.
